The Happiness Project

Check out The Happiness Project, Gretchen Rubin's blog about finding happiness. Here is her description of what the blog is about:

I'm working on a book, THE HAPPINESS PROJECT--a memoir about the year I spent
test-driving every principle, tip, theory, and scientific study I could find,
whether from Aristotle or St. Therese or Martin Seligman or Oprah. THE HAPPINESS
PROJECT will gather these rules for living and report on what works and what
doesn’t. On this daily blog, I recount some of my adventures and insights as I
grapple with the challenge of being happier. THE HAPPINESS PROJECT will hit the
shelves in late 2009 (HarperCollins).

One feature I especially like is her lists of tips that she writes every Wednesday. Here's an especially relevant one entitled Seven topics to avoid if you don't want to risk being a bore. Number one on the list: a dream.

Here's another interesting, related one: Quiz -- do you make other people unhappy?

Note: most of her lists aren't so negative -- these just happen to appeal to me!

I really like her writing -- she's sincere, writes often, and brings in material from a wide range of sources.

Beth's website and dream journal

My friend Beth Terrell-Hicks has posted a link to her website in my comments section under one of my dreams posts. (By the way, the comments in The Half-Assed Game are usually the best part, because most of my friends have ideas as interesting as mine but are better writers than I am.) Beth's an author, and her website is devoted primarily to writing.

Beth is an unusual dreamer: she almost always dreams in the third person and watches the stories unfold. Beth's dreams, and writing, and waking life all deal with good conquering evil. Read about some of them here.

This blog isn't about my dreams... honest!

But, I did dream about worms again this morning: My mom and dad and I were in a house, and there were worms and I had to get rid of them, and I had to do it, not somebody else, and I was grossed out by them, and they carried lots of germs, and I had to get rid of 'em by catching them and cooking them in the oven. I wondered why I couldn't just flush them, but the answer was they might get out into the environment.

Consciously, I love earthworms, but subconsciously, I hate them. I've been dreaming about them for years.

Why you should never tell anyone your dreams; and, one damned thing right after another

Once while reading a book about dreams I came across the theory that you should NEVER tell anyone your dreams. Why? Because by doing so you were giving them power, because they could see what your unconscious mind was thinking, or if not, their unconscious could, or if not, it thought it could. And since you didn't understand your own dream content, you didn't know what you were telling them.

I shared this theory with my mom, who said, "No, you shouldn't share your dreams because it's boring."

You've been warned.

I am going to recount a part of last night's dream as an example of what I mean about one damned thing right after another. And problem solving. Some of the problems are italicized:

"So there I was, returning from my trip across the south that entirely avoided Kentucky. And had to buy a dress for a fancy occasion. Anxiety! Will I find a good one and can I afford it? I selected several to try on. I started looking through Sarah Jessica Parker's closet but knew I couldn't just take one of hers, because she'd miss it (which would be shameful) and plus, it'd be too high-fashion and wouldn't look right on my body type. So there I was, starting college. I had already missed several of the first few classes. I was trying to go to the classes and figure out how to make up the work. I was standing in line to talk to one of the teachers. I overheard in line that in the English class, our assignment was to write about Why we like the home football team (presumably it was the Titans, but I don't actually remember the team's name.) I thought "Whoa, they're really trying to make this easy for MBTI S's, aren't they?" I wondered whether it'd be ok if I wrote about why I DIDN'T like football, since I don't, or whether I had to learn to like football over the weekend so I could write the essay. I figured I'd better ask. I got in a different line to ask that teacher. When I got to the front, I needed a form which I didn't have, and had to search in my purse and show them my driver's license. I asked her and the actual topic was not football: it was to write a paragraph, in the form of a non-rhyming poem, about why I like hanging around with introverts. Easy! I do like hanging around with introverts. But a paragraph? This class is too easy. I should be in a much harder class. Wait a minute! I already have a bachelor's degree. Why do I have to take freshman English again? I'd better tell them so they can put me in a more advanced class."

I have failed to completely capture the confusion and the sense of continual shifting of problems. But other than that, this is pretty typical. I woke up this morning thinking "That was a good one." But then realized that nothing really good happened except that I'd enjoyed the trip across the south and I was kind of looking forward to some of the classes. And of course, I enjoy problem solving.

So I am going to create a poll. Think about your own dreams and whether they are usually a constant stream of problems with you trying to solve them and/or making logical sense out of them, or whether they are some other way.

The picture is the winning design of last week's episode of Project Runway. Sarah Jessica Parker was the guest judge and chose this design to be mass produced as part of her line of clothing.

New Theory of Dreams

I've always considered myself pretty lucky in the dream department, because I have them and can remember them most every night. But recently I've noticed that yes, I have them, and remember them, and enjoy them, but objectively, they're all pretty bad. Occasionally something fun and elaborate will happen, and then there are the funny set pieces like the time Beavis and Butthead and I were riding that roller coaster singing "If you believed in miracles, baby, so would I," but typically it's more like this: something's gone wrong at work that I have to fix, or I am a dj and can't cue up my record in time, or I can't park my car, or I have to eat worms. It's just one damn thing after another -- like life, only much moreso.

Antti Revonsuo, a researcher at the University of Turku, in Finland, has a new theory that the purpose of dreams is to allow us (and animals) to practice facing threats. They are "a dojo for perfecting waking activities." Read about it here.